How can one learn Thai in 20 minutes , really? Well , because the guy who created the language was the same guy who named our capital city after what us girls love to do with a hot guy after a few drinks. No, I jest. The reason is , if you can get yourself to think like you’re so remarkably stoned – to the point where you can barely put together 20 words of the language you speak – then that’s all you need to be fluent in Thai. And I can get you there in 20 minutes. No not by feeding you mushroom cookies like they’re M&M’s , but by comparing how easy Thai is to this unnecessarily …
You’re being watched ! From the moment you step off the plane in Bangkok you’re being discreetly photographed and privately talked about as information about you is collaborated and disseminated. By whom though? CIA , FBI , KGB ? None of the above. The culprit here is the closed group , and well guarded Facebook group of Thai girls that numbers over a quarter million now who have likely made you the topic of conversation at one time or another during your stay here. “Their modus operendi: post the photo , find out who’s fucked him , who’s dated him , what’s his net worth , and is he worth the time and effort to pursue.” Or in layman terms …
If you live here , you’re a stereotypical expat no matter how much you claim not to be – and as such Thai girls will avoid you like the plague. I just read a charming introductory email from an expat smartly titled Pawn to Queen 4 – who does his best to claim he’s not typical of the kind that reside here in Bangkok : Pawn to Queen 4 Hi Mistress, Hope life is wonderful for you. My name is xxxx, I am xx years old and I live and work in Bangkok. Yes I could potentially be categorized as a ‘long time Bangkok’ resident. All I can say in my defense here is that I don’t believe that …
This is more a bit of friendly advice than a story intended for those who not only want to live here but are going to be raising kids here. Everything the baby hears should be in your mother tongue right from the day it’s born. No exceptions. If the mom doesn’t speak your language , that’s fine , but make sure the television shows , the books , the YouTube videos and most importantly the school is subjecting your kid to your language 90% of the time. The result? Well it’s like running a marathon. Nobody is declared a champion after the first 500 meters and it’s not until the first 5km are over that you start to get some …